Toy Gun Legislation

“If you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns,” people said.

Still, they outlawed guns, and while it was true only outlaws had guns (that argument worked with anything illegal, such as “If you outlaw murder, only outlaws will murder.”), the number of guns was greatly lessened, for there were so very few guns for the outlaws to get.

Even with guns becoming virtually impossible to find, legally or illegally, many criminals still tried to get their hands on one, and when they couldn't, they would use toys and replicas to make people think they had guns. Congress decided it wasn't enough to legislate guns. They had to legislate the glorification of guns as well.

“If you outlaw toy guns, only outlaws will have toy guns.”

Toy guns were outlawed anyway. Strangely enough, this did nothing to curb imaginary gun violence. Criminals would charge into banks with weapons made of foam or brightly colored plastic and still people would give over the money. The gun was a symbol, they realized. People didn't brandish guns to kill people during crimes. Most wanted nothing to do with a murder charge, in fact. They had them to show they were willing to kill, and most people tended to relent to that kind of hostility, regardless of how imaginary the death may be.

- Originally mailed to M. Krell in Horn Lake, Mississippi