After
a long quest that took him through the gates of Death and back,
Fishback, having learned to rule over humans and stolen the secrets
of shapeshifting from cat to man and back from the gods, decided to
put his new found skills and abilities to good use. When he set out,
he intended to enslave his human and perhaps all others, but in
learning what life was like for humans, he was swayed by pity and
chose instead to help the unfortunate animal that was man. His own
human Andrew, for instance, worked hard all week and barely had the
time to care for Fishback, let alone himself, and barely had the
money to do likewise. Fishback decided to use his abilities to help
his human, and by extension, all humans. He opened a consulting
firm.
After Andrew left for work each day, Fishback would brew a batch of shape-shifting potion and go to work, where people paid him to sit around all day and share with them his benevolent understanding of humans and how to treat them better so they will be able to do better in return. Then, at the end of the day, he would lock up his business, hide the money he earned in places Andrew would find it and assume he had lost or forgotten it—under couch cushions, in the pockets of winter coats—and return to his feline form, ready to greet his hard working human with a nuzzle of appreciation for his selfless service.
His human worked less and was therefore generally happier and more affectionate. Fishback got more cuddles and felt better about his contribution to the world, and others the world over learned to treat each other better under his tutelage. It was a win-win-win.
After Andrew left for work each day, Fishback would brew a batch of shape-shifting potion and go to work, where people paid him to sit around all day and share with them his benevolent understanding of humans and how to treat them better so they will be able to do better in return. Then, at the end of the day, he would lock up his business, hide the money he earned in places Andrew would find it and assume he had lost or forgotten it—under couch cushions, in the pockets of winter coats—and return to his feline form, ready to greet his hard working human with a nuzzle of appreciation for his selfless service.
His human worked less and was therefore generally happier and more affectionate. Fishback got more cuddles and felt better about his contribution to the world, and others the world over learned to treat each other better under his tutelage. It was a win-win-win.
The End
Originally
mailed to M. Haley of Lake Orion, Michigan
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