Hal the Wonder Goat

The town of Kerry erected a statue to Hal the Wonder Goat. Hal could do sums, but that's not what made him the Wonder Goat. It wasn't that he could fly or shoot lasers from his eyes. He could, but that wasn't what made him the Wonder Goat.


What made Hal the Wonder Goat was that he once ate a tin can, and everyone watched in awe as the chewed up metal failed to give the goat indigestion. This amazed the residents of Kerry, for they knew the stories of goats eating tin cans were just myths. Still, Hal did not seem to know, and as a tiny kid, he nibbled down a can of baked beans, metal and all.


The town erected a statue of their marvelous goat in the center of town, and every day as Hal would walk by, he would think, “They made a statue of me. I sure must be wonderful.”

And so he tried wonderful things, fueled only by the belief that he must be able to do them, or else why would the poor farmers have erected a statue in his honor? And so he balanced the village budget. He put out fires with his ice breath. He ran a successful campaign for mayor. In his life, he did many wonderful things because he knew he was wonderful.


- Originally mailed to J. Tahon of De Haan, Belgium